Looking Back at Elwood High School (Elwood College) Days

I entered EHS in February 1958 from Elwood Central and left in October/November 1962 to do Matriculation exams at the Exhibition Building.

I was an out of area student living in Windsor. I travelled to school by various means such as bus, tram (even the one that ran done Glenhuntly Rd), bicycle and on two occasions walked.

My time at EHS could not be said as joyous, I was happy and content, but I diffused (not intentionally) a negative aura with the teaching staff. I cannot quite find the right word to describe my being/time at the school.

My general recollections are as follows: EHS was the only school that had a war-cry that was shouted at inter-sport carnivals.

Spruiker (S): Where do we come from?

Chorus (C): Elwood.

S: What do we eat?

C: Mussels.

S: How do we eat them?

C: Alive.

I do not know the origins of the war-cry but it was operational in 1958.

During the tutelage of Headmaster (HM) Wade, the teaching staff wore academic gowns.

Before the electronic school bell was installed a hand bell was used. During 1958 it was stolen by two Form 3 boys (one being the son of a local notary): both were expelled and only one returned to the school.

Mrs Bertha Teller (French Teacher) was vegetarian and extolled the virtues of eating seaweed.

My misdemeanors or indiscretions started in 1958. Myself and one Fred T and I decided to cycle to the French Consulate in the City to collect pamphlets for our French project. This escapade was planned for the afternoon that students, representing the school at sport, would be excused classes – Fred and I joined this throng. We duly collected our pamphlets and returned to school the next day. Unknown to us, we were seen by Mr Flynn (Art and Sports master) in Milton St outside Fred’s home and reported to HM Casey. We were independently chastised and reprimanded by the HM. I believe, in all the times that I graced the HM’s office, it was the only occasion that I did not receive ‘two or more of the best’.

For misbehaviour, one was normally sent from the room to stand outside the door. I was of such stature, I was able to hide in the coat lockers that lined the corridors to avoid the deputy HM, standing at the junction of the two buildings, beckoning with finger to come hither. (I should note at this stage that the school consisted of two buildings in an ‘L’ shape with one building parallel to Shelley St, the other to Goldsmith St.) If one was sent out of the room to see the HM the ploy was (this would only succeed if the classrooms faced Shelley St) to walk to end of the corridor turn left at the building junction walk a further 15 yards turn left into the schoolyard, walk along the covered footpath to the boy’s toilet where one would wet their hand with water and slap it against the corner of a wall – the result, a red mark across the hand. You would then retrace your footsteps and re-enter the room and resume your seat. If you were asked had you seen the HM, you held up your hand to show the red mark. I was never asked to verbally reply, so therefore I never told a lie. Only two teachers (to my knowledge) conducted independent punishment. Dr Wolf initiated an open hand to the back of the head (a Zeke Special). There is mine and many other’s forehead imprint in the old desktops. ‘Scrub’ Scown crowned students i.e. striking a knuckle to the top of the head. As Mr Scown never taught me, I was never crowned.

Form 3 an incident occurred of which I am not proud, nor I believe the other members of 3C are. Form 3C were an unruly lot that resulted in Dr Edols (English) having a nervous breakdown, taking extended sick leave never to return to the school again (I believe). After a Term 2 history exam, the class was harangued by Mr Radvansky, which based on the results, no one would pass History at the end of the year, except one person (the singular thought that went through everyone’s mind), Sue Cameron will pass). When Radvansky mentioned my name, the class broke out in raucous laughter – how soul destroying.

Intermediate (Form 4E) was all boys and consisted of 10 subjects, most a variation on a theme such as Art, Art history. Four of those subjects were taught by Dr Aldor. Dr Aldor wore a tweed sports coat that was basically brown with different flecks of colour. As he walked up and down the desk aisles, students would empty their fountain pen of ink by slashing it down his back. Near the end of the year, one student was emptying his pen when the Dr placed his hands behind his back and received some ink on them – that was the end of that ploy. Mrs Green was a supervisor for one of our final year exams. She duly perched herself on top of the front table and crossed her legs and before she gave the word to commence writing she uttered,” Control your inner urges boys”. I have forgotten whether I passed or failed that exam.

At the end of the year, Mr Lester (French) called me to his office and enquired if I intended to do French in Leaving. On my reply of No, he said “You passed”.

At some stage an IQ test (round pegs for square holes) was conducted and I was raised to Form ‘A’ status for my final two years. Form 5 was uneventful except, Mr Watson (Physics) threw chalk to disturb the conversations being conducted between myself, Bob De Kleyn, Vicki Marantz and Pearl Mead.

Democracy eventually arrived at EHS in Form 6, students were able to nominate to be a School Prefect, although final scrutiny was conducted by the staff. I was discussing nomination with some of my cohorts and was within earshot of Miss Rowan (Deputy HM, English). Her comment was “Armstrong do not even contemplate it” – another boost to my flagging morale. Miss Rowan spoke to an International Student, Madan Yusof and suggested it would be better for his education if he sat next to someone else during English lessons. Madan remained loyal and sat with me for the year.

During the year, I was introduced to a School Inspector by HM Wade as an enigma. Ah! that is the missing word; my time at EHS was enigmatic.

Messrs Simfendorfer, Atkinson, Watson, Gardiner, Lester, Radvansky, Mrs Teller, Miss Selby, Drummond, Rowan, Drs Edols, Aldor and Wolf and the other teachers, whose names I have forgotten due to poor or loss of memory, have had an influence on my life. The one that had the most profound effect was JJ Will; the grounding he gave me in my final two years in mathematics has stood the test of time – his instruction was a delight to be part of.

My achievement at EHS, I suppose I laconically could suggest, was that I was one of the few that had an open invitation to attend the HM’s Office at any time during school hours. I represented the school, in my final two years, in baseball with the likes of Peter Searle, John Saunders. Our mission, above all else, was to beat MBHS and that success was achieved both years. My proudest achievement was to be the first EHS student to enter and graduate from the Royal Military College of Australia, Duntroon – I believe a few have followed.

Brian Armstrong

Fide et Diligentia